Rough few days

Not a great weekend for me. Ever experienced mild depression and low patience for NO REASON!?! That was my weekend. I felt overwhelmed with the amount of laundry I need to do (still need to do it), the upcoming weeks events, the frustration over Maddie's apparent inability to move forward with her hearing, etc, etc...

Maddie has also been pushing every, single button I have. If her Daddy tells her to do something she will comply happily. If I do it....she refuses, yells, etc. Not pleasant and very tiring...

Well, today is better. Something about a ridiculous amount of sleep will often turn your mood around (to bed at 8:30 PM last night). Maddie and I dropped Carson off at school and then went to Hardee's to get a drink before speech therapy. Miss Maddie wanted a coke...I said, "no." She then refused to look at me or answer the question about what NON-CAFFEINATED drink she wanted. So....guess what? She got nothing. Nada.... Recently, she has been pushing me so hard that I was actually worried about doing this simply because I knew there would be hell to pay. Guess what? We survived and I WON!! All you parents out there know what I mean! Lesson learned and she actually stopped the crying pretty quickly. I know it was a hard lesson, however her entire disposition changed towards me after that. It was one of "those teaching moments."

I share this as an encouragement to other parents. Oftentimes, those teaching moments are not fun! It is harder for us than the child!! They are worth it....I promise!

God Bless,
Heather

LOOKING FOR A GIRL FROM WUHAN

Maddie is on left (pale blue jacket) and the girl we want to find is on right

This is the little cutie we are looking for! :)

Maddie's Name in Chinese (?) along with her friend's name (I think)

UPDATE: This child's name has been translated for me....her name is WU SU LIN!!

As many of you are aware, Maddie was living in Wuhan, China's Child Welfare Institute for approximately two years prior to joining our family in February 2010. Since she is profoundly deaf, she had no means of communication at the time of her adoption. On the day we met, she came with a lovely photo album prepared by the staff at the Child Welfare Institute(CWI). It had approxmately twenty photos of her time prior to becoming our daughter and even photos from the day she opened one of the packages we sent....what a blessing these photos are!!

Even though she was almost 5-years-old when we adopted her, her difficulty communicating hindered her ability to share memories of life prior to us. We have used the photo album to try to keep those memories alive until her language skills allowed her to share things with us. There are photos of other children at the CWI in this album and there is one little girl that she has always told us was a good friend. Since there are a number of photos of this girl, we assume they were pretty close.

Recently, Maddie has asked about this sweet little girl....wanting to know if I know where she is, what her name is, etc. I am not sure what SN the little girl has, however believe that Maddie would be able to tell me if she remembered a "visable" need (i.e. limb difference, etc). Furthermore, Maddie tells us that the little girl slept in the same room as she did (toddler beds). We are estimating that the little girl was approximately 3-years-old in February 2007.

I am not able to determine if the little girl was still at the CWI at the time Maddie left. While Maddie has shared that she remembers children leaving, she is not able to recall if this little girl is one of them. Sadly, at the time, Maddie did not understand why the kids were leaving....only now does she rejoice in the knowledge that they must have been headed to a family.

Please take a peek at the photos I have posted. Also, I uploaded a picture of the back of one of the photos since it appears to have 2 names. I am assuming one is Maddie's name (Wu Meng Jin) and the other is of the little girl. If anyone can translate it for me you will have my gratitude!

If you are headed to Wuhan at some point in the near future and can print this child's photo to inquire about her whereabouts we would be so very thrilled!!

As all parents who adopt from China (and likely other countries as well) can tell you, we often have so little knowledge of our child's life prior to the adoption. Any piece of information that we can gather is so very precious and so very important to our child. What a blessing it would be if I could locate this dear girl and share with Maddie her whereabouts! I also have a number of photos of her that I would love to share with her parents (assuming she has found her forever family). If she is still at the CWI, Maddie and I would love to send her a package and possibly look into sponsoring her in some way.

I have posted this at a number of yahoo groups (Wuhan CWI and Toddler-Adoption, etc). Please feel free to forward this post to anyone you might be able to assist us!

Thanks so much. Would you join us in praying that this little girl is safe in the arms of her family and that I can make this connection on behalf of my dear daughter!?!

In Him,
Heather
thelukefam@gmail.com
babygirlmakesthree.blogspot.com
Madison (Wu Meng Jin), DOB June 1, 2003
Adopted: February 19, 2008
SN: deaf
Wuhan Child Welfare Institute

Two Years and counting...

First time we saw Maddie, February 18, 2008

Maddie and her bestest-buddy, Daryll. They are the cutest things together....ain't love grand?

You think my Yellow Belt is proud??

On February 18, 2010, we celebrated our two-year anniversary having Miss Maddie in our family! Two years of craft supplies littering my floor, two years of hair ties scattered around the house, two years of frilly socks and pink clothes filling my laundry basket, two years of a little girl filling our home with giggles and two years of love. It continues to amaze me, as I watch my sassy-girl insist on the "perfect" outfit to wear to school, that just two years ago she was wearing layers upon layers of mismatched clothes that did not fit. Two years ago she could not communicate the most basic of needs. Two years ago she tells me that she was, "Waiting, waiting, waiting and waiting for her Mama and Daddy." Oh honey, we were waiting and waiting for you also!

This last year has brought many changes to Maddie's life. The biggest being the decision to implant her right ear with a cochlear implant. Yes, she can now hear "normal" speech sounds. No, she does NOT know what she is hearing. She is slowing learning how to discriminate the myriad of sounds she hears everyday. It is going to be a long, long process and none of us knows what the final outcome will be. Our goal was to simple make life a little easier for our girl. We wanted her to play outside with her friends and know that when she hears a car to get to the side of the road. We want her to have the ability to relatively easily communicate with hearing/non-signing people by picking up some of the words they are saying, reading their lips and, most importantly, reading their body language. She is currently understanding the LING SIX sounds with almost perfect accuracy (M, OH, AH, SH, S, EE). She is working on animal sounds along with other beginning word sounds. She FINALLY has learned to love music. For a little girl who has been hearing for only four short months, she has really good rhythm.

As we have said before, it is important to say again....Maddie is deaf and will always be deaf. That may sound silly to some, however it is am important statement. The CI did not and will not miraculously turn her into a hearing person. She missed many years of hearing...so many that she will likely NEVER rely totally on her CI. We are embracing American Sign Language as our family's second language. I am currently in as ASL class at the local college and plan on continuing taking the classes until I am fluent. You might be surprised at the relative ease the boys have picked up on the beautiful language of ASL. Even for Carson who has unique challenges of his own, specifically fine motor difficulties, it is a language that he is acquiring at an amazing pace. Maddie and Carson go to the Little Gym once or twice a month for Parent Survival Night without a parent. Carson acts as Maddie's interpreter and it works great. It has given him an unbelievable sense of pride and has boosted his self-confidence. Maddie seems to enjoy having two big brothers who so willingly and happily help her when needed. She has successfully wrapped each brother around a little finger and relishes in being the Princess of the house!

Maddie is still loving gymnastics! She recently participated in a graduation ceremony for completing a class...the photo attached shows how happy and proud she was of her accomplishment! Carson earned a yellow belt in Karate that night also! For any of you with children who are interested in dance, Karate, gymnastics, etc, let me highly recommend the Little Gym. Not only do they have an amazing philosophy of using positive reinforcements, but embrace children of all kinds. In fact, some gyms actually have classes specifically for children with special needs. My kiddos don't require that level of care, however it is an option for some. Not only have they embraced my kids, but each week try to learn a new sign to communicate with Maddie. Good, good, people embracing a company philosophy!

Austin is starting both soccer and track and field soon. While I usually stand firm with my "one activity at a time" rule, I am allowing him to try two! He is maintaining good grades and has a plan in place in order to juggle the addition time commitment. I, on the other hand, may need money to pay for my additional transportation costs! :) While he is much like his Mama and seems incapable of keeping his room clean, I try to forgive that transgression! :)

In a nutshell, this two-year anniversary finds us blessed. With Brian's increased travel demands we have days of stress, we often go to bed with a messy house and dirty clothes to do, however we are blessed to be in a lovely home and to have one another.

Heather

If you ever find yourself thinking about pursuing the adoption of a child who is deaf, do not hesitate to contact me. It is not a path for everyone, however a much easier path than I believe many think. Our day-to-day lives have not changed much with the addition of our girl...ok, I do have to get that head of messy hair under control in the morning! The primary effect she has had on our family is adding a touch of "girliness" that was sorely needed! Maddie has rounded out our family perfectly...when you follow God's Call and allow Him to Lead, that is what happens...things just work.

Our family wishes all of you a Happy Chinese New Year. We thank you for keeping us in your prayers.

Ho, Ho, Ho

The kids saw Santa yesterday on the USS Truman.....they had so much fun at the party! The staff of the ship do so much to providing fun opportunities for the families when the ship is HOME! It really helps the kids when their Dad is gone to have spent a lot of time on the ship where he is working/living.

We will post more photos after Christmas.

sooooo much going on!!!

Halloween 2009

CI Activation November 16

Disney, October 2009

Somehow it is November 30th! What?!?!? Where in the world did the Fall go? We had been busy! In October we took a trip to Disney (fun, fun, fun) and returned to get get unpacked and prepaired for Maddie's cochlear implant surgery. The surgery went well (amazingly so) and she was activated a little over a week ago.

After a rough, rough start. She is now wearing her CI about 4 hours a day. She can say "home, Mama and no." She has the sweetest little voice you have ever heard - - not surprising, huh?

Austin has completed his soccer season (they were undefeated during the regular season) and is enjoying working (yep, for pay) as a referee! You should see him running the field...he looks so stinkin grown! I hate it!

Carson will move to a new school in January - YEAH!! Many of you know that we do NOT believe he is in an appropriate setting and we have finally somewhat convinced them of that as well! He also brought home an unbelievable report card - 3 A's and 2 C's! This from a young boy who was lucky to get a C last year! He is working sooooo hard!! I just about passed out when I saw the report card.

God has blessed us.

Heather

Remember this?

Above is a photo of the first time we set eyes on Maddie. Remember this? Look how scared she was! This seems like a different child in so many ways. She did not know if she could trust us...would we be around forever....what was a family? She just did not know.
Here she is after six days with us. Six days and she is figuring out that, yes, we are sticking around. Six days and she is giving us smiles.

Again, six days and look at that face. Ya think she is starting to trust us?

Now, you need to be aware of a situation going on right now with a Chinese adoption. A family has been forced by the US GOVERNMENT to leave their adoptied daughter (she is 4 yrs old) in China. After about one week together, they have to return to the states and leave her. It is a long story so it is best that you read here....http://jayscruggs.livejournal.com/

Please, please, please contact your Congressional representative and beg them to get involved. Think of Maddie. What if we had to leave her in China after one week together? What would that do to her ability to trust us? How would that have fundamentally changed her personality?

There is a video of the parents saying good-by to their daughter. I will be watching it after the kids are in bed as I am sure it will require tissues and prayers to get through.

I know my little blog does not get much traffic, however I am begging you to send people here to see updates on this case. My heart is breaking for this family that I don't know.

Most importantly, please pray for this little girl. Pray that God protects her sweet heart until the US Government can fix this situation.

Heather